Slutty pumpkins, slutty accountants, slutty Freddy Kruegers, slutty babies, beware: I hate your Halloween costume. Okay I lied, slutty babies, I loooooove your costume! The rest of you can take a hike. I vote more homemade costumes! More costumes that require you to raid your grandma's house! More costumes that you didn't pay $59.99 for! Seriously, I was perusing an online costume retailer the other day for wig options and the prices of these cheap, ready to wear costumes are ridiculous. Where did all of this indignant outrage come from you wonder? It came from here...
Aside from my (super cute) blue sneaks, this plastic costume was the first and last time I wore a store-bought costume. Judging from the picture on the red trash bag I was wearing, this was a poor excuse for a Peanuts character. Luckily it got better from there.
Probably my most favorite costume to date, this punk rocker get-up. Clearly authentic, suburban 2nd grade punk rocker, ready to rage against the institution.
While my decision to dress like an angel (with Christmas garland accessories) wasn't remarkable, my brother's Mac Tonight costume was legendary. If you don't remember Mac Tonight, I'm sorry.
Clearly I'm too old to trick or treat here (8th grade maybe?) so I'm not sure what I was doing but what 12 year old doesn't want to be a frazzled housewife? Don't be jeal of my eyeglasses. Each lens was about 4 inches in diameter. Go 1992!
Ahhh college. Why look cute when you can look slightly insane as a Hawaiian mumu-wearing tourist?
This was the year that I joined up with a girl going as a....slutterfly. Yes, really. I mean, how do you compete with that? Ugh and ugh. So I went with the then-socially relevant yet still alive Anna Nicole Smith. This was during her insane reality show days. This was during my insane drinking/college days when I should have had a reality show.
Because if I don't seem like a geisha-type of girl, then I don't know who is...
During a mandated tv show-costume party, we went with straight up thrift store finds to be Fred and Velma from Scooby Doo. Sorry John, not the best look for you. I, however, was before my time with my hipster glasses.
Dead giveaway that this costume is pre-baby? Oh only the fact that I had time to rig up LED lights to my Price is Right costume. And man, John made a fine looking Bob Barker, if I do say so myself.
Office Space costume was one of my faves just because it was so darn comfortable.And again, sorry John.
Dude, magnetic removable pieces on my Operation costume. Dedi-freakin-cation I tell you. Meanwhile, posting this on the internet again is a good reminder to never wear head-to-toe baby pink or that disgusting wig ever again. Good thing I don't mind looking like a freak in public. Also, have you noticed that John is always such a trooper for wearing the things I make him wear? Hotttt Poccccket!
Al and Peg Bundy costumes. I'll give you one guess as to why John liked this one.
We're actually dressing up again this year, after taking the past two years off due to being boring parents, so I now have three costumes to think of. My idea is set and Gabe's is tentative so I need to come up with something awesome for John. Maybe this year I won't make him look insane? Maybe.